Where I get it: Part 322

I picked my parents up at the airport yesterday (yay!) and when I went to give my dad a hug, his nose was covered completely on the left side with black soot. So much so that I was afraid to hug him because it would spread over me like a disease.

While he was in the bathroom powdering his nose (sorry, I couldn't resist) my mom shows me that she has spent the entire day at work and on the airplane, not with two different socks, but with two different shoes.

Witness:
This photo is now set on my caller ID on Ivanka.